Poisoned Depression
by Riz93
Summary: Two yeas after Breaking Dawn, a spider bit Seth while he was out patrolling. The venom had slow but severe effects, creating a voice in his head that will slowly lead him to misery, despair, and finally suicidal attempts. Dark Fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Poisoned Depression**

Two yeas after Breaking Dawn, a spider bit Seth while he was out patrolling. The venom had slow but severe effects, creating a voice in his head that will slowly lead him to misery, despair, and finally suicidal attempts. Dark Fic.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

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**The First Bite**

So far, I've had everything that I need, and mostly everything that almost everyone wanted.

I was smart, the top of all my classes that are a grade level higher than me. I even helped Jacob, Embry, and Quil with their physics, because I already took that class. I was popular among my peers, and there would be girls asking me out. I turn them down though... I didn't want to end up in a Sam-Emily-Leah drama, which by the way, has ended.

Two years have passed since the Volturi's visit, and everything was at peace again. A month after that, Leah amazingly imprinted on this guy named Jason Brandon; she's pretty happy now. A month after that, Emily and Sam finally got married; Sam decided to stop phasing and retire, and so he let Jared be the alpha. Five months after that, mom and Charlie finally started dating, and though they were very slow in the beginning, I think they're working out pretty well right now. Two months after that, Emily gave birth to twins: Sarah and Landon.

Leah and Jason got married three months later; She was now Leah Brandon. A week after the marriage, a nomadic vampire trespassed our territory and Jason phased; he was very surprised. It turns out his real father was Joshua Uley. Shocker. In the end, it didn't matter though. It only strengthen the little respectful friendship he had with Sam to the half-brother level. Leah still loved Jason. Moreover, they could be together forever.

Life had been happier for everyone, I guess.

It was now summer vacation, and I'm gonna be in my senior year, but for now, I have to do patrols around Forks. Tonight, Quil couldn't make it since he volunteered to babysit Claire. Embry took over for him and he was right now complaining.

"_Dude, why did you even say yes?"_ I snapped at him a bit, getting kind of tired of his whining. If Leah was here...

"_Cause man, he's my friend, and plus he begged."_

I sighed a bit with aggravation; Jacob was going to take over soon in the next two hours. Maybe I can just finish the rest of the patrol to save myself the frustration.

"_Really?"_ I heard Embry said with excitement.

I sighed at this._ "Yeah sure, go, get out of here."_

"_Thanks, man!"_ I watched him go and run back tot he reservation, and then he was gone.

I let out an exhausted sigh; I was so used to having company in patrolling at nights like these, but I guess things have been busier,or happier for everyone. Ever since Leah imprinted, she was doing patrols less and less. Jason and Leah spent more dates than in patrol, but it was understandable. Moreover, if they were in patrols, it was too distracting...and disturbing.

Jacob has been doing less patrols, because of Nessie, but then again he also didn't want to be an alpha. He didn't want to take up these duties.

I didn't either, but I was still patrolling.

I ran through the border, making sure no leech was passing by. I ran it twice. I was getting faster after always doing patrols for people's favors.

Soon though I hit a giant spider web...with my mouth open.

Oh man, that is GROSS!

I spit it all out, and even though it was tasteless, it still felt disgusting. Man. That sucks.

I heard laughter ringing in my head and I knew how just came in. Hey Jake.

"_So Seth...Planning to become spiderman?"_

Har, har, funny. Anyways, I'm leaving. Good luck with the patrol! I said as I ran to La Push.

"_Yeah, okay, see you around, web-eater!" _Seriously?

Once I was close to home, I changed back to human form and I was about to get my clothes, but then I felt pain on my leg like when a bug bite you.

My hand smacked the creature that was on my leg and sure enough, it was a bug, or to be more specific, it was a spider. I watched it crawl away, and I thought that must be the spider that owned the web home that I just ate... for certain, Jacob was not going to let me live it down.

I looked at the bite that the spider left, and saw the redness that was actually showing. I panicked a bit, but then the redness disappeared and the tiny wound closed up.

Okay...I guess I'm good.

I put on my jeans that was underneath the bushes before I walked inside my home. I saw Leah and Jason making out in the couch.

I cringed in disgust. "Ugh, gross," I said and quickly, I ran to the kitchen. Just in time to avoid the flying book.

I looked around for any food available, but it looks like mom didn't make anything. I guess she's out with Charlie again.

I went to the fridge and got out some left overs. Maybe I should just eat at the Cullens for this summer, or until my mom decides to cook food every night.

"_It would be better if she had one less mouth to feed._"

My head snapped as I looked around, trying to find where that voice came from. It was high, feminine voice and it sounded so...sinister almost? It didn't sound like Leah at all.

I looked out to the living room and saw that Jason and Leah returned to watching TV. Good, my eyes were saved. "Hey Leah, did you say something?" I asked out loud.

She looked at me with a strange look and so did, Jason. "No," she replied.

"Oh okay, I just thought I heard something," I said then I quickly asked, "Can you make me dinner? Please?"

"Nope, sorry, Seth. There are left overs in the fridge though." Lazy, uncaring sister of mine just cuddled up closer to Jason.

"Okay," I said. To be honest, I felt a little sad. I wonder why she wouldn't cook for me anymore...

Again...that voice came back.

"_Because you're not worth her time."_

I am so. Stupid voice, go away.

"_Really? Then why won't she cook for you, but she cooks for Jason? See that left over apple pie? You know Leah baked it for him, and he didn't have to ask. But when you asked, she'll always flatly say no to you."_

Shut up! That's not true. I'm her favorite brother!

"_Was, stupid baby Seth. Jason's more important to her now than you'll ever be. Same as Charlie to your mom."_

I was so mad...so frustrated that I could phase into a werewolf right then and now, but I kept yelling at the voice that she was a liar. Soon the plate that I held so tightly had crack. Oh shit. I quickly started cleaning up the mess.

"Seth, what was that?"

"Nothing!" I yelled. "I just broke something..." I murmured that last part though I'm sure Leah have heard it.

"_Oh yes, breaking something was nothing at all._"This voice was really pushing my buttons.

Why am I hearing a voice anyway? Am I going crazy? Soon on, I lost my appetite and I decided to put the food back.

I decided to go to my room and sleep. Maybe I've been working too hard...and just hearing voices, or a voice, is one of them tired issue problems.

I didn't bother changing as I just simply plopped down on my bed and closed my eyes...

Soon, I drifted off to sleep with a slight tingling of pain on my leg...

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Not as dark as it would be, but this is only the beginning of the chapter.

Next chapter would get a little worse for our Seth here.

Moreover

Guess what kind of spider bit Seth!

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I got good three reviews. Not so bad. (:D) Thank you!**

**And now, we'll make Seth even more frustrated!**

**Please read and enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight Saga!**

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"**Baby Seth"**

I was in the middle of the hallway of my home. I was walking down the stairs, a small cobweb on the corners. I didn't do anything to it, I just kept going down to the first floor.

I looked around and everything around me was a dark shade of gray. In the living room, the TV was on, but no reception. I saw dad on his couch watching, but right now he was asleep. I walked over to him and placed my hand on his forehead.

The touch was cold as ice almost like a vampire...but dead and sad. I pulled my hand back. I looked down and saw a ray of bright orange light. I turned around and the light was coming from the kitchen.

I headed over to the kitchen and saw my mom cooking breakfast for once, and there was Jason and Leah eating pancakes. The bright flame from the stove brought life and color to the kitchen. They were gesturing me to join them. They all looked happy, I wanted to join them.

However once I blinked, they were gone, even the bright glow that brought color back for the moment. Now it was the color of dray gull, a feeling of sadness and loneliness. The stove stopped burning and the food on the frying pan was burnt.

The food on the table cluttered into a mess and to my fear, spiders crawling all over.

I hurriedly left the kitchen and went back to the living room. My dad was gone as well and the TV was broken. I looked around once more and saw some photo frames that were on the coffee table.

I went over to investigate and the photos showed everyone that I love and all of them were smiling. Leah and Jason in one photo holding a baby, and the other was Charlie and mom holding hands, both wearing rings-wedding rings. There were some kids there too that I did not recognize. I see Claire all grown up, hugging Quil. I see all of my pack brothers with some one beside them. I see the Cullens all happy as they got along well with everyone; they were all having a bonfire.

They all looked so happy...but...Where was I in the picture?

"_They left you..._"A voice said as a spider lowered it's web from the ceiling to face me. Was it talking to me? "_They left you...you're all alone..._"

Before I knew it, the whole house was on fire. I couldn't move, but I can only watch the photos before me burning to ashes.

"_They left you..."_ The voice said again as I closed my eyes. All the while, I was feeling anger...sad...depress. Moreover, I could feel misery. My heart wrenched at the true grim reality of this nightmare.

I opened my eyes...

And I saw the white ceiling above me. The colors coming back, but still dull. For a while, I didn't move until the alarm clock on my bed side rang loud. I let it beep for a while...

"Seth, turn that stupid thing off!" I heard Leah yelling and I reached over to turn it off.

I didn't move for a while. I just kept lying down...thinking about the dream.

I wiped my face and I felt something wet. I pulled back and there was...water? Shit, was I crying?

_Awe, poor baby Seth._

Who are you? This voice was fucking annoying me, moreover, it was freaking me out.

_I'm the voice from deep of your self-conscious mind._

My self-conscious mind is a girl. It's official. I'm loosing my mind. Maybe I could ask Edward about this...

_Don't bother. He's too busy sucking face with Bella. He has no time for you. Neither does Dr. Cullen. He has more patients that are more important than you._

SHUT UP.

_What? You can't handle the truth? Poor baby Seth._

You know what. You're just here to put me down, trying to bring me into the dark side.

_See? You're always fooling around. That's why no one will ever take you seriously. You're only a fool. A joke._

I winced a bit. That one stung. I was trying to just treat this voice as a joke, but man, she was good at pushing buttons.

_Who said I'm pushing buttons? I'm only telling you the truth, Seth. They don't like you. They don't care about you anymore. You're just nothing, but a patrolling mutt, running everyone's errands. They're using you._

I started to think of what she said about it, about them using me. Now that I think about it, don't they always ask me to do their patrols? Didn't they always ask me to help them with their homework and in the end, I had to do them?

I guess...at least, I'm useful.

_Useful to their wants, but you're nothing that they actually need. You can always be replaced._

I laid down for a while on my bed, thinking of what my voice have said. Maybe she's right...maybe I'm just really nothing.

I got up from bed and decided to go take a shower. Once I turned it on, the shower was cold but I felt strangely too numb to even think about it.

I had no idea how long I was there in the shower, but I had to step out. I don't want mom to be worrying over the water bill.

_Well, maybe if you just leave, her bills would go down._

Stupid voice. I tried to ignore it as I changed into my clothes. I quickly dried my hair with the towel, hanging it up, then leaving the bathroom. I headed downstairs when I smelled pancakes.

I walked right into the kitchen and saw Jason and Leah eating most of the pancakes. None were on the serving plate. I pouted a bit.

_Awe, they forgot about you. Look, they haven't even noticed that you're there._

"Seth?" I looked over to see my mom frying pancakes. "You want some, dear? I'm sorry, there's only a bit of it left. Maybe you could wait for more?"

_Look at her, Seth. She hasn't even eaten yet. You're just wearing her down. No sooner, she's gonna die like your dad did._

The nightmare from last night came back to my mind. Images of my dad flashed into my mind, and immediately, I felt sick to my stomach. I wasn't hungry anymore; I was suffocating almost.

"Seth?" Mom called me again, snapping me out from my thoughts. By now, Jason and Leah have stopped eating and were now looking at me.

I shook my head at her. "Nah. You eat it, mom. I'm not hungry." I turned around and headed for the door.

"You're not?" I ignored her and went outside. "Seth!" I kept ignoring my mother's calls as I entered the forest. I kept walking away, walking around aimlessly.

For once, I felt like the walking dead. I could feel the world around me being to spin. All I could see were the trees and leaves circling like the slowest tornado ever. I leaned back against a tree and sat down on the grass.

I suddenly felt so nauseous; I curled up with my knees together and put my head between them. I breathe in and out deeply, trying to keep my stomach down.

_You're so pathetic. Poor baby Seth._

"Shut...up..." I said through my clenched teeth, I was now gripping my head. What was wrong with me?

_Nothing's wrong, baby Seth. You just don't want to hear the truth. You're nothing special to them._

"Shut up."

_Does it hurt to know the truth, Seth? To know that they stopped caring about you?_

"Shut up!"

_Poor baby Seth... _She started laughing-cackling so sinister and so conceited. Her laughter louder as it echoed all over my mind; I wanted her to stop.

She kept laughing, and laughing as I tried to shut her out. Shut up...Shut up...

"SHUT UP!" I yelled and everything was silent. For the moment, the world stopped spinning and I didn't feel sick anymore.

Can werewolves even get sick?

I leaned my head back and let my hands dropped. I let my whole body to just relax, enjoy this silence...while it lasted.

I didn't know how long I was in this position. Maybe a couple of hours, and in that long period of time, the voice never spoke again.

"Seth?" I was about to groan when the voice came back, but I realized this voice sounded more masculine and deep. I turned to my left and saw Jacob.

He walked over to me, giving me a worried look. "Hey Seth, what are you doing here?"

He reached his hand out to me and I was about to take it...

_Need some help getting up on your feet, baby Seth?_

I stopped and stood up by myself. Jake gave me a confused look before pulling his hand back.

I was dusting myself off when he asked me, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure."

"Positive." I paused then I asked, "What do you want?"

"Emily's having barbecue right now."

I looked at him strangely. "This early?" Isn't it still ten in the morning?

"What do you mean? It's 12 o'clock, Seth. I came to get you."

_He was sent here to get you, not that he wanted to._

Shut up. He came to get me anyway. "Oh, okay." I said nonchalantly.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I said I'm fine!"I snapped at him and he backed off. "Okay, okay, just asking." I gave him one look before walking away.

We walked to Emily's house in silence, which wasn't too far. I could smell that aroma of hot smoky dogs. I would be jumping for joy for it like Paul would be, but I didn't have an appetite.

Everyone was there already, lounging around with the outside doors and tables, and it was only Jake and I missing. They already started eating, not that I care. They always do that.

_You're not important enough for them to wait._

Do I care what you say anymore?

"Hey Jacob, Seth!" Emily called to us and we went over to her where she was holding paper plates, each plate had two hotdogs. Sam was still grilling the dogs, though I think he had a few.

I took my share and thanked Emily before going over to sit on one of the folded chairs...

One of its leg wobbled and suddenly, CRACK! The chair broke, my hotdogs soiled, and I fell to the ground. Everyone gave one look and started laughing, even Jason and my sister. Usually, I would have just laughed it off, but I didn't feel...myself today. I was mad and humiliated, and them laughing at me was not helping.

The voice in my head was laughing was as well.

"HAHAHA! The hell was that? _Baby Seth_ getting a little too big for his chair?" My blood ran cold and I glared at Joshua, who was obnoxiously laughing along with Jared, Paul, Quil, and Embry, and the rest was stifling their laughs.

I ignored them as I picked up my soiled hotdogs, placed them back on the plate, and headed inside the house to throw the food away.

As I was heading Emily's way, she was smiling amusement though something about my expression made her frown and with concern.

"Seth, are you okay?" She asked. She then grabbed me another plate, but one hotdog. "Here, you can have another. Don't worry about the chair. There's an extra one in the kitchen."

"Thanks...sorry about the chair," I told her and I went inside the house. I dumped the food in the trash can.

I started looking around for another chair that Emily mentioned, but then my eyes caught the window. I see Josh reenacting my embarrassing stunt, wearing the most moronic expressions while everyone laughed.

_See? They don't care about you. You're nothing but a joke._ The voice spat and I was starting to believe it...

No, no, I'm only having a bad day...bad day...

I turned heading to the front door; no way was I going back out door. I sat down on the steps and decided to eat my hot dog there.

I took one bite and I shuddered as I chew slowly, tasting this odd...possibly inedible food. I chewed more and eventually swallowed it. My stomach felt strangely full, but I know I had to eat. I haven't eaten last night or this morning. But still, I really didn't want to eat this.

I hadn't realized that time had pass when Jacob, Leah, and Jason came out from the front door.

"Seth, where were you?" My sister asked.

And then Jacob. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine." What's with everyone asking me if I'm okay?

Jason then stepped in. "Come on, Seth. Everyone's having dessert right now and...you're still eating that hotdog."

"You want it?" I asked, offering it to me as I got up on my feet.

He shook his head. "You better finish that. You didn't eat dinner last night or breakfast this morning."

"I'm just not hungry," I said and before they could cay anything else, I walked pass them heading inside. I ignored them calling my name.

I went outside to the backyard, and sure enough everyone was eating cake. I saw to my left the remnants of the broken chair. I headed over to Emily who was holding a plate of cake slice. Unfortunately, Josh saw me.

"Hey Seth, had a nice fall? Let's get you bigger chair." I ignored him and took my share from Emily.

"Hey, Seth, you gonna eat that?" Paul asked, seeing that I was still holding the half-eaten hotdog. I gave one look at it before nonchalantly passed it to him. "Here, take it."

I saw Leah, Jason, and Jacob coming my way. Looks like they're just going to pass Emily and come right toward me. Probably make a scene.

I turned the other way around to get away from them, even if I had to pass distance with Josh.

However, I shouldn't have. Right at the moment, a couple of the younger wolves, Kyle and Logan, were pushing each other. Logan bumped hard into me and the cake was smashed to my shirt.

Of course, Josh busted out laughing in this obnoxious nasally, mocking laughter. So did not help my anger when the voice started laughing again. I started taking off my shirt and Logan looked at me with eyes wide.

"I'm so sorry, Seth-"

"It's fine." I held my hand at him to stop him from saying any further. Fuck. I hate today.

_Awe, poor baby Seth, you gonna cry? _I couldn't take it any longer. I was already shaking in rage, and Josh just kept laughing and laughing. His annoying voice was edging me closer to phase and just kill him.

_You're nothing but a joke. _I heard the voice again. _Nothing but a clown. A baby. _If someone says "baby" one more time...

"Awe, shame about the cake. Should we buy you a puppy bib, hm? _Baby Seth_?"

I snapped.

I was already right in front of Josh, my fist tightened and lock, and then I flung it right at his jaw. Once contact was made, a sickening crack was heard. I was _almost _satisfied. When they were too shock to move, I instantly took advantage of this. I got on top of Josh and started punching him square in the face. He was too shock, frighten, and in pain to do anything, but take my blows.

After a couple more, his face was all messed up and bloody. That. Satisfied me.

I leaned in and whispered, "If you fucking call me _baby Seth_ again, I will fuck you up not only your goddamn face, but your body, piece by piece! I'll even slit your throat and rip out your fucking vocal chords-!"

Hands reached out and pulled me away from the quivering Josh. To my disappoint, his face was healing but at least I shed so much blood from him by just beating up his face.

Embry and Paul were both holding me back. Jacob was in front of me, making sure if I tried to escape and go for Josh again. Leah and Jason came at my side too, fear in their eyes. Heck, everyone was afraid...of me. Kyle, Logan, and another werewolf, Taylor, went to help Josh. Sam and the others were standing in front of the imprinted girls, protecting them like I was also going to attack them. I wanted to scoff at that, even at Quil bringing Claire inside the house.

Josh groggily stood up and looked at me with fear and he was also enraged, "Are you fucking crazy?"

"I'll show you fucking crazy!" I yelled as I thrash around to escape their grip and reached for Josh. Embry, Paul, and Jacob restrained me. Josh of course backed away.

"Seth. Calm. Down. That's an order!" I couldn't calm down. I was just so mad, so enraged, so furious!

"Seth!" Jacob yelled again. "Stop attacking Josh!"

I stopped, but my body was still shaking. It's strange how I haven't phased into a werewolf yet.

"Calm down," Jacob said to me again and I was starting to calm down.

I stopped shaking soon after, but then I was sick and tired of Embry and Paul holding me tightly. I was getting pissed off again. I used the trick that Jasper taught me.

I pulled my arms together to my chest, then I thrust my elbows right towards their guts. The wind got knocked out of them and they had to let go. "Get the fuck off me!"

Everyone flinched back a bit and the pack got ready as if I was really dangerous, but I stood my ground. I looked at Josh who was staring at me with fear and I scoffed at him.

I turned my back on them and walked away...

...feeling somewhat...numb...

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**Ultra Seth Ooc.**

**But hey, the voice was annoying.**

**Anyways, please review and tell me what you think!**

**Tell me other things to make Seth depress.**


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